I sat across from the
scholarship committee, their question to me marinating in my mind.
What motivates me to do service?
It’s a question I have been
wrestling with in some capacity for the past two years, although the question I had asked myself took a slightly different route:
What would even motivate me
to live an others-centered life? Why should I even care about other people?
In the pit of deep
depression, despair and hopelessness that I found myself in during Spring/Fall
2012, I found that nothing that surrounded me could answer that question—not
the church families surrounding me, not the education that I was getting, not
my closest friends at the time—nothing. I was searching for Truth desperately,
searching for what made sense in this “meaningless life.” I was searching for
why I should even live on this earth another day. I was asking to whom should I
live for if I were to choose to remain living on this earth—which I had already
decided at that time that I probably should.
It has been a long journey
since that rough time of searching in my life two years ago, and it has only
been in the last year that I could actually start to verbalize “what motivates
me to do service.”
As I sat across the
scholarship committee, all of this flashed through my mind in a matter of a few
seconds. I took a deep breath, and shared with them this analogy.
* * *
“What motivates me to do
service? Whoa. Alright. Ummm…hmmm…I know why, I just—okay. Okay. Yeah. I know
this is a secular institution but you asked me what motivates me and…well.
I’m a follower of Jesus
Christ. And that in and of itself is a statement with an entire conversation,
but being a follower of Jesus had led me to a life of service. Jesus is like,
absolutely incredible. And he handles culture and cultural differences SO WELL.
He’s over there talking to the Pharisees (who were like the people in power),
and they say something and he’s like BAM in response, totally calling them out
and revealing their biases and duplicities and LOVING them through this. Let me
tell you, I learn SO MUCH from seeing how Jesus replied in situations. And I
learn so much about my own duplicities and biases and…it’s just INCREDIBLE.
Yeah. So. Hmmm.
I think…I think something
I’ve observed in my journey is that some people tend to view theology and
service like this.
They view theology and
service as parallel to one another. So, some people will align with one side or
the other, and kinda, dunk into the other side, but one is not necessary for
the other to exist. Like, church groups with do volunteer work and dunk into
the service track, or people who are heavily involved in service may dunk into
“church” for a bit, or even theology. The definitions here are all really
vague.
But the point is is that
some people see theology and service as parallel to one another.
I see theology and service
as intertwined. Like, I cannot separate one from the other. At all.
Without theology, I would
not do service work, and without service work, I do not think I would be
obedient to the commands of Jesus Christ. Theology and service are
interconnected, intersected, and a direct reflection of one another.
So what motivates me to do
service? A belief that I as a Christ-follower am commanded to love my neighbor
as I love myself. What motivates me to love my neighbor as I love myself? A
belief that I am the beloved of Jesus Christ. It really all goes back to Jesus.
Service? Well…it's like the
intersection between Jesus and Justice.”
* * *
What I love about Mission
Year is that the program reflects this intersection of theology and service. In fact,
Mission Year’s motto is “Love God. Love people. Nothing else matters.”
I look forward to being a
part of sustainable justice work in the community that I will be living in. I look forward to better understanding
how Loved I am and how to love others better.
I look forward to living in the intersection of Jesus and Justice, the intersection of theology and service.
Would you consider being a
part of this journey with me?
https://missionyear.thankyou4caring.org/donate
Designation: Amber Cullen
I volunteer at a dog shelter :)
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