Lament:(v)

Today is a day of ache.

It is a day of facing my own depraved humanity right in the mirror.

“White privilege is alive and well and it’s me.”

I think it could be nice to take a little vacation from this nation.

Maybe my journey would take me to another country where I can act as if the world is not one giant groaning system of people mistreating people mistreating nations not listening to nations and we sit and stare and wonder “When, O Lord, will this all end?!”

Maybe it would be nice.

But that nation would have its fair share of non-flourishing as well.

(No matter where I go I see the brokenness of the sun.)

Some days I can’t remember what it is to flourish in a world of fear.

Some days like today I weep with anger and pain as I feel a sliver of what life might be like for another whose life is marked by a constant state of societal oppression.

Some days I wonder if I have ever truly chosen to love after all (for I more often choose fear than unmasking honesty.)

I wonder.

I wonder what it would be like to dance on the back patio in the snow.

Maybe we could build a snowperson together, and you could teach me your name.

We could fumble through the awkward misunderstandings that come along with navigating one another’s difference culture.

Maybe we would talk about our families or what brings us life.

It would be a challenge, but it would be a relationship deep in grace and forgiveness.

Maybe, just maybe

We can build a glimpse of the put-together-sun—

Together.

(We are a unified breath of humanity.)

Leadership Spotlight: CIC Students

     As the Program Coordinator for the Center for Digital Inclusion and Technology (CDIT), I live “behind-the-scenes.” Because I work more on the administrative end, I don’t have as much face-to-face contact with students as others in our department do. Although this is the case, I am intentional in meeting our students—adults, teens, kids—all coming to our building to learn skill sets on how to navigate and create on a computer.

     Out of all of our student demographics, it is the adults who teach me the most. I frequently walk by our computer classroom and see faces turned attentively towards the Computer and Internet Class (CIC) instructor, K.B., as he walks the class through making flyers on Microsoft Word or learning techniques in Microsoft Excel. This deep yearning to learn and a thirst for knowledge is an attitude I have seen reflected in the students of CIC from the time they first call me to sign up for the class, to the day that they graduate.

     I have such a deep admiration and respect for our adult students.  Many are older, and haven’t had prior computer training. I’ve had numerous calls with prospective students where they have very honestly stated that they have little knowledge with navigating computers—some not even having an email address. For many, classes with K.B., our instructor, provide an opportunity to have a community to journey with in the process of learning skill sets on computers. To watch the determination and commitment of these adults as they journey through the course is incredible. I aspire to live out my commitments with the same kind of tenacity that I have seen these adults display.

     I met a woman who is a leader in her church who wanted to learn how to make flyers to aid in advertising her church’s community outreach events (her final project flyer was for a Free Clothing Giveaway they were actually hosting). I met a man who yearns to take the skill sets he learns in the CIC class and help others in his community learn how to use the computer. Yet another woman is in the CIC class to gain basic knowledge so she can put on her resume that she has experience in Microsoft Excel. Other adult students yearn to learn skill sets so that they can navigate the computer on their own, this being motivation in and of itself. One woman works at 4:00am and still goes to class from 6:00-8:00pm that very same evening because she wants to learn these skill sets. That is incredible. Absolutely incredible. 

     Two weeks ago, we welcomed our CIC Spring 2015 students during orientation. I introduced myself to the class, being welcomed by familiar faces from the Fall that will be continuing to the next level of classes, and new faces of people I have yet to meet.

     As this Mission Year continues, I am grateful for this season where my story intertwines with so many dedicated students at the People's Emergency Center who are teaching me that education and learning is an empowering, life-long journey.

To learn more about the Center for Digital Inclusion and Technology: http://www.cditech.org/

To support me in this Mission Year: https://missionyear.thankyou4caring.org/ambercullen