They brought guns to the birthday
celebration, giving the gift of trigger-happy protection as “affection.”
We cannot go anywhere without being followed by fear. Even the grocery
greeter holds a butcher knife, eyes darting quickly to the left and right. (I’ve
forgotten how to not live in a constant state of anxiety. I’ve forgotten what
it feels like to greet another first by looking at them in the eyes rather than
checking out the weapon inventory around their waist.)
Our law enforcement tried to teach us
to not use guns by using guns.
We’ve been desensitized to their power.
(They gave up and stopped coming by.)
We use guns to protect ourselves rather than what others use as
protection—well-thought-out words and fake facades--
Both block out vulnerability
and authenticity.
Both are a product of “I’m not enough.”
* * *
We cannot go anywhere
without being followed by fear.
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